Struggling in School?

Is Your Child Struggling in School?

Are you seeing your child struggling in school, yet the school doesn't feel it's "that bad"?  

I grow weary of hearing comments along the lines of "they're not struggling enough to qualify for resources." 

Based on whose measure of "struggling"?  

If a parent is expressing a concern, then the child is obviously struggling in some way, otherwise the parent wouldn't be bringing it up.  It's time that schools* started taking parent concerns seriously, rather than trying to sweep them under the rug, minimize them, avoid taking responsibility, or put up a fight in order to see if the parent is serious enough to push.  Not all parents know how to advocate for their child or know when it's within their rights to do so.  

*Note:  This is absolutely not all schools, nor all teachers, nor all administrators.  Many school staff go above and beyond for their students and all schools in Manitoba are underfunded, under resourced, understaffed, and over stressed.  Unfortunately schools have been put into the position where they have to triage in order to ensure their very limited resources are available for the students who need them most.  

Our focus here is on the teachers and administrators who don't take parent concerns seriously or think that a child is doing "fine" simply because there aren't obvious behaviours or indicators that are easy to spot.  Some children are very good at "masking" or hiding their struggles, some students do very well on standardized testing and are still seriously struggling.

Masking can be a result of a child developing strategies to "fit in" with their peers, not wanting to stand out, or being afraid or embarrassed to ask for help when they need it.  It can also be a result of having behaviours punished repeatedly or being shamed for problems related to their disability (such as a child with ADHD behaving impulsively and speaking out of turn in class) to the point where these behaviours are suppressed.  Suppressing behaviours is not the same as providing support for the underlying causes and masking can have a serious negative effect on people's mental health, self-esteem, and wellbeing.

When it comes to accessing resources and referrals at school, this usually means either the student's behaviour is disruptive, or their struggles are made obvious on standardized tests.  

Those are not the only two ways in which children struggle and it's long past time all schools recognize that and prioritize student mental health and social-emotional learning.

What Masking Can Look Like

• The school reports that a child is doing very well, yet that child has has a meltdown when they come home from school, or is very emotional before and/or after school. 
• Your child is struggling socially: expresses feeling lonely, describes being left out, and/or has frequent trouble with peers at school. 
• Your child does well on academic tasks, but this comes at great cost.  They may spend hours on homework in order to get it right, show traits of perfectionism, and have a great deal of stress and anxiety about their school work or about school in general. 

Please note: These are general examples, but of course masking will not be the only reason for children experiencing these struggles at school.  It is even more challenging when a child with ADHD is also academically very bright or gifted, as their intelligence may also overcompensate for their challenges related to their neurodiversity.  (There are actually quite a few aspects of giftedness that overlap with ADHD, such as emotional intensity, but I digress...). 

If readers get nothing else out of this blog post, I want the following two points to be made abundantly clear:

1. Academic success is not an acceptable reason or excuse to deny a child their right to accommodations and supports for their disability.  
2. Social-emotional health is much more important than academic performance and children do not learn well when they are highly stressed, anxious, fearful, or working so hard to mask that they cannot absorb what is being taught.  

I repeat: 

Academic success is not an excuse to deny a student accommodations and supports for their disability.

And, perhaps just as harmful, please do not tell a child with ADHD or a learning disability "you're so smart, you just need to work harder and apply yourself."  They would if they could.  They very likely can, but first they need (and have the right to receive) the appropriate help to do so.  All students deserve to be able to show the very best of themselves, not just “good enough” based on the classroom teacher’s opinion.  Meaning: if a child is doing well academically, but it’s causing them significant psychological, emotional, or social difficulty, then they still require accommodations so that they can be their best self without it taking a toll on their mental health.  

Beyond assessment, we want to instil in students a love of learning and foster a joy in curiosity.  If a student is very bright, but school is a daily slog which they dread every day, then their chances of meeting their potential and pursuing higher education decrease every year that goes by without proper support.  

Beyond academics, the core subjects are not the only thing children learn at school.  In fact, there have been many studies clearly demonstrating that students forget a significant portion of the academic cotent they are taught in school.  What they do learn and remember meaningfully are relationships: Relationships with peers, teachers, and other school staff.  Public safety data in Canada indicates that 47% of parents report their child has experienced bullying in school.  Children with ADHD are 13% more likely to experience bullying and social challenges, that’s up to 60% of children with ADHD who might experience bullying (Unnever & Cornell, 2003).  

Much more important than memorizing multiplication tables, all children in schools need to learn about neurodiversity, disabilities, and celebrating individual differences in general.  When whole classes and schools are taught facts about neurodiversity, those students are significantly less likely to bully other children for being different, and are much more likely to be kind and inclusive toward those children (Cook et al., 2020).  Knowledge and understanding goes a long way toward fostering acceptance -- acceptance from peers, and acceptance of ourselves and all the strengths and struggles that come with our neurodiverse brains.  

When students are given appropriate accommodations and supports they are less anxious, less stressed, and more able to engage with their peers because they feel more comfortable at school.  The CADDAC has some great suggestions for specific accommodations and supports for various ADHD symptoms that can impact children at school.  

In closing, I will reiterate the two most important points I wanted to make clear in this post:

1. Academic success is not an acceptable reason or excuse to deny a child their right to accommodations and supports for their disability.  
2. Social-emotional health is much more important than academic performance and children do not learn well when they are highly stressed, anxious, fearful, or working so hard to mask that they cannot absorb what is being taught.  

If you are concerned about your neurodiverse child and need help advocating for them, please do not hesitate to contact us.  

 

References 

Cook, A., Ogden, J., & Winstone, N. (2020). The effect of school exposure and personal contact on attitudes towards bullying and autism in schools: A cohort study with a control group. Autism : the international journal of research and practice, 24(8), 2178–2189.

Unnever, J. D. & Cornell, D. G.. (2003). Bullying, Self Control and ADHD. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 18(2): 129-147.

 

About the Author

Jillian is an ADHD 2e Coach and Child Advocate in Manitoba, Canada.

Jillian has a diploma in Child & Youth Work and a Degree in Psychology, as well as being the parent of an amazing 2e/ADHD child.

Visit ADHDPro.ca and Facebook.com/ADHD2ePro to learn more.

Further Resources

ADHD 2e Pro has compiled an extensive list of Manitoba-local and online resources for ADHD.  

We also have a blog post with advice for advocating for your child.  

ADHD Awareness & Education

3 Facts Everyone Should Know About ADHD 

It's #ADHDAwarenessMonth, so we thought we should share the top 3 basic facts we wished people understood about #ADHD, with help from an expert, Dr. Russell Barkley.  

1.  Yes, ADHD IS a legitimate Disability.  

Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise.  

ADHD has nothing to do with having too much sugar, too much screen time, or not enough discipline.  Some ill-informed (or uneducated) people try to brush it off as "he just needs more exercise".  No.  An ADHD brain is wired differently from other brains, and a sugar-free, gluten-free, screen-free diet is never going to change that.  

    ADHD is a chronic (meaning life-long), developmental disability. 

Dr. Russell Barkley explains it better than we can 

(YouTube video below, or tap here on mobile): 

Note:  Dr. Russell Barkley has some very strong opinions on ADHD.  Being a psychiatrist, he focuses on the medical model, which can sometimes come across as quite pessimistic.  Please take what you need from the information he presents and leave the rest.  Dr. Barkley has such a wealth of information about ADHD, it's worth sitting through a few statements that you may find disagreeable.  

An ADHD brain is wired differently from other brains.
No sugar-free, gluten-free, screen-free diet is ever going to change that.  

2.  "Attention Deficit" is a misnomer 

    (in other words, it's a stupid name, and Dr. Russell Barkley agrees with me)

(YouTube video below, or tap here on mobile)

 

3.  ADHD is a disorder of regulation, and it is NOT a deficit in knowledge.  

ADHD is difficulty with emotional regulation, physical regulation, and attentional regulation.

(YouTube video below, or tap here on mobile): 

ADHD is an incredibly complex disorder that is too often oversimplified as "trouble sitting still" or "difficulty paying attention".  To learn more click here for a more in-depth blog post called 7 Ways ADHD is Misunderstood.  

ADHD impacts so many aspects of peoples' lives and the fact that ADHD is stigmatized and misunderstood makes life that much more difficult for those who have it.  

About the Author

Jillian is an ADHD 2e Coach and Child Advocate in Manitoba, Canada.

Jillian has a diploma in Child & Youth Work and a Degree in Psychology, as well as being the parent of an amazing 2e/ADHD child.

Visit ADHDPro.ca and Facebook.com/ADHD2ePro to learn more.

If you need help educating your child's school, your family, or with general ADHD coaching or advocacy, please feel free to contact us.  

My Child Was Diagnosed, Now What?

My Child Was Just Diagnosed As Neurodiverse... Now What Do I Do?  

First, take some time to digest and process this news.  

Breathe.  Call a friend.  Have a glass of wine.  Go for a jog.  Whatever your self-care is, do that first.  

Ok, now, let me tell you something about your child's diagnosis that you may not realize:  This is a good thing.  Seriously. 

Your child is exactly the same person they were before they received their diagnosis, it changes nothing about who they are.  They already knew they were different, and so did you, otherwise you wouldn't have pursued the assessment.  This diagnosis can provide some answers, understanding, and insight.  

What a diagnosis can also do is open doors to resources and supports that a child may need to be on a level playing field with their peers.  Once given these appropriate accommodations, both you and your child may begin to see what they are capable of.  This is so important because this is when they start to see their own strengths.  Many neurodiverse children struggle with low self-esteem because of all of the corrections and criticism they receive, so opportunities for them to shine are imperative.  

This new information provides an opportunity for adults in the child's life to educate themselves so they can better understand the child's unique needs, challenges, and strengths.  Seek evidence-based information on your child's neurodivergence and learn about how to best support them.  We have a blog post with book and podcast recommendations if you're looking for a good place to start.  There are also online communities of parents of differently wired children where you may find other parents and families with similar experiences.  

 

What Do I Tell My Child?  

A lot of parents wonder if they should even tell their child about their diagnosis, especially if they are quite young.  While each family will have to make their own decision based on what they think is best for their child, our advice is usually: yes.  Once you've had an opportunity to process the information, tell your child.  Chances are they already feel different and don't understand why.  This could help put things into perspective for them.  Many children blame themselves for being different, especially if they have been getting into trouble at school, at home, or in social situations.  It's important for neurodiverse children to understand they are not less than anyone else, it is not their fault that they've been struggling, they were simply born with a brain that works differently from many others.  

The good news is now that we know more about our differences, we can develop strategies to let the strengths shine through.  Remember to explain that our differences come with both challenges and gifts; there will be both pros and cons to having a different brain.  ADHD2e also has a blog post outlining some of the other ways in which getting a diagnosis can be helpful.  

If you're not sure how to explain the diagnosis to your child, seek the assistance of a professional.  The professional who did the assessment may be able to help you with finding age- and developmentally-appropriate ways to explain their findings with your child.  

 

What Happens Next? 

Once you've had time to sort through this information as a family, the next step is likely to inform your school.  If a school psychologist did the assessment, they can help provide information and recommendations to the school team.  If your child has been struggling at school, this is a good time for the school team to outline those specific struggles and how they will support and accommodate your child and meet their needs.  This should be a collaborative process with input from the classroom teacher, the resource teacher, the school psychologist, and the parents.  Depending on the student's age and comfort level, they may meet separately with the parent and teacher and/or the resource teacher, so that the child's experiences and wishes can be heard.  If not, the parent can discuss the child's goals at home and share them with the school team on their behalf.  Whatever way it happens, it is very important to give the student a voice and allow them to have some input into their support planning.    

Depending on the level of support and accommodations needed, the school team may develop an IEP/SSP for the student.  This is a very good idea because it provides documentation outlining the accommodations and supports agreed upon and should outline S.M.A.R.T. goals for the student.  The teams should meet regularly (usually once a month at first, and then less frequently as the student requires less support) to discuss the student's progress and make changes to the SSP as needed.  An SSP is a "living document", which means it changes along with the student as their needs and goals change.  

We recommend co-parents attend SSP meetings together if possible, or that a caregiver bring a support person along.  These meetings can be intimidating and overwhelming, so a support person can help take notes and provide moral support. 

 

What Else Can Parents Do?  

Depending on the child's diagnosis and needs, there may be other interventions to assist.  Some of these may be:

• Occupational Therapy (OT)

• Individual or Family Counselling

• Sensory Supports (such as fidget/sensory toys)

• Medication and/or paediatric oversight if appropriate

 

A note on professional services: 

ADHD 2e (and many experts) strongly recommends seeking out child-centred services that focus on: 

• Highlighting and building on your child's strengths (strengths-based supports)
• Helping you, your family, and your child see, appreciate, and foster these strengths 
• Clinicians/professionals who support neurodiverse children to love and accept themselves for who they are and give them the tools to self-advocate
• Avoid professionals who try to "fix" or "cure" a child's neurodiversity, or try to "train" humans to "act normal" 
• Professionals who help you and your child develop skills and strategies for managing the challenges that we can encounter due to neurodiversity 
• Important:  These skills & tools should be those that make the child's life easier, not others'.  Avoid professionals who encourage masking or forcing the child to adapt to neurotypical expectations

 
If your child sees a GP and does not yet have a paediatrician, we recommend getting a referral.  Here in Manitoba paediatricians are hard to come by, but if you have the option, ask your GP to send in a referral.  In Manitoba you can also register for the Find-A-Doctor service if you do not have one.  

There are also a number of community organizations with a variety of services, depending on your child's needs.  The psychologist who did the assessment and/or your division's social worker should be able to provide some resources for you, and many such services can be found online.  ADHD 2e has also compiled a number of local and online resources on our website.    

The next two most important things that we can do for our children are these:

Educate yourselves, your family, and your child's school.  You know your child best, and now you are getting to know them even better.  This will strengthen your relationship.  

Love your child unconditionally, show them with both words and actions that you love and accept them for exactly who they are.  Allow them to be their authentic selves and show them you appreciate all of who they are.  We are so lucky to have these incredible, unique individuals in our lives.  They will teach us a lot.  We will learn a lot.  What we want children to learn is that they are loved, understood, and accepted.  Nothing is more important than a sense of security and belonging.  

That is not to say that this journey is easy.  We all experience daily challenges and times when we really don't appreciate our child's behaviour.  There are extreme highs and lows.  Be compassionate with your child and with yourself.  Seek out your community, a support network, and take care of each other.  

 

Seeking a Diagnosis?

If you suspect your child may have ADHD, but haven't begun the process of seeking an assessment and possible diagnosis, ADHD 2e Pro has created a page outlining some of the options available for next steps you can take. 

Resources

Please visit our website for a list of ADHD resources available in Manitoba, as well as online resources.

If you need further assistance advocating for or supporting your child, please do not hesitate to contact us.  We are here to help.  

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When a Diagnosis is More Than Just a Label

"A diagnosis can help people find their cohorts, which in turn helps them to feel less alone."

When a diagnosis of ADHD is much more than just a label

 

Understandably, sometimes parents or caregivers are anxious about pursuing an assessment or diagnosis for their child because they are afraid of their child being labelled: Afraid of teachers or peers making assumptions about their child and not giving them a chance.  There is, of course, this risk with any diagnosis.  

However, if a child is struggling enough in their life that parents are considering intervention, then I would posit that some teachers, adults, and peers may already be making judgements based on the child's behaviour.  Worse, that child may be making harsh judgements of themselves, and without an explanation, they and others may blame those struggles solely on the child.  

Resources & Treatment

When a diagnosis of ADHD is made by a qualified professional, it can open up a world of information for families.  Once we have an understanding of what we are dealing with, we can educate ourselves, and we can find out what resources are out there for us to access.  We can develop skills and tools to manage the challenging parts of neurodiversity to make life easier for ourselves, and most importantly, for our children.  

A diagnosis also allows students to receive appropriate supports at school.  Where we live, we have something called an SSP (Student-Specific Plan), formerly called an IEP (Individualized Education Plan).  In the U.S. they also have IEPs as well as a 504 plan.  

 

 

Whatever the name of the document, the intent is for adults who care about and support the student (i.e. principal, teacher, guidance counsellor, school psychologist, parents) to meet and discuss ways in which the student is struggling, and then develop child-centered plans for meeting that student's needs.  

We can also seek treatment.  Whether in the form of counselling, an ADHD coach, pharmacological intervention (a.k.a. meds), once we have a diagnosis we can see what often works for others with the same diagnosis and try them out for ourselves.  

 

Self-Esteem

 

Many children with ADHD already struggle with low self-esteem.  If they are not taught that their ADHD is a nuerodivergence and are given the message (either intentionally or unintentionally) that their struggles are their own fault, this can truly wreak havoc on their self-image.  A diagnosis can help the child realize "oh, so that's what is different about me, it's not my fault!"  We usually need to help children come to this viewpoint, many will not get there on their own, especially if they've already begun to develop a negative self-concept.  We have to guide them to see that their brain is different and this will sometimes make certain things harder, and at times it can be a superpower.  

The more we provide support and help children develop skills and tools to manage their symptoms, the more success they will experience, and the better their self-image will become.  This will also set students up for better success in the future because they will have the scaffolding beneath them that will allow them to internalize and then utilize these skills independently.  

 

Understanding & Empathy

 

Not only can a diagnosis help a person understand themselves better, it can help others understand and support them more effectively.  As parents, there are times in our lives when we ask "why on earth would you do that?!"  Sometimes (but not always, sorry!) a diagnosis helps answer that question.  

Understanding and knowledge help us to be more compassionate toward children when their behaviours are challenging and test our patience.  They can help us see things from the child's perspective, which allows us to be more empathic.  So many children with ADHD desperately need more understanding and compassion from the people in their lives, and this starts with adults being better educated about ADHD and neurodiversity.  

 

A Community  

"You have ADHD?  Me too!"  A diagnosis can help people find their cohorts, which in turn helps them to feel less alone.  Just search for ADHD hashtags on social media and you will find a community of people supporting and accepting each other and celebrating their neurodiversity.  

#Neurodiversesquad (founded by Dani Donovan), #ADHDTwitter, and #NeuroTwitter to name but a few.  

There are various online and in-person groups that families can join to find others who are on a similar journey.  Knowing others are in the same boat can be very validating.  

One of the most important feelings in childhood is a sense of belonging, of being accepted and liked for who you are.  

Let's be honest, that's one of the most important feelings in adult life too. 

 

Seeking a Diagnosis?

If you suspect your child may have ADHD, but haven't begun the process of seeking a diagnosis, ADHD 2e Pro has created a page outlining some of the options available for next steps you can take.  

October is ADHD Awareness Month

Each year, the Centre for ADHD Awareness, Canada (caddac.ca/adhd) hosts an ADHD conference.  Due to Coronavirus restrictions, this year's conference will be held entirely online, but this makes it more accessible for those who cannot travel.  

Last year, the CADDAC created a series of videos called "ADHD and Me" aimed at children to help them understand ADHD better from a kid's point of view.  There are a series of "ADHD Speaks" videos from adolescents and adults with ADHD as well.  

 

About the Author

Jillian is an ADHD 2e Coach and Child Advocate in Manitoba, Canada.

Jillian has a diploma in Child & Youth Work and a Degree in Psychology, as well as being the parent of an amazing 2e/ADHD child.

Visit ADHDPro.ca and Facebook.com/ADHD2ePro to learn more.

  

7 Ways ADHD is Misunderstood

Seven (of the many) ways in which ADHD is about so much more than difficulty sitting still. 

"But he can focus on things he enjoys for hours at a time!" 

That was my own reaction when the school psychologist gently suggested that we learn more about ADHD to see if we wish to have our son assessed.  

Despite my degrees in Social Work and Psychology, I actually knew very little about the complexity of ADHD and the myriad of ways it can impact peoples' lives.  Having not been in University since 2009, it was certainly time to update and increase my knowledge.  Fast forward a year and a half and both our son and myself have been formally diagnosed (me at age 36! - My son by the school psychologist and his pediatrician, and myself by a psychiatrist specializing in Adult ADHD).  

Little did I know that this hyperfocus was also part of ADHD and that hyperactivity and inattentiveness are just two parts of a very complex disorder that Dr. Russell Barkley explains is not actually a disorder of attention, it's a disorder of regulation.

Following up on my previous post on the seven executive abilities that are impacted by ADHD, which Dr. Barkley reviewed in a recent podcast discussing Adult ADHD.  I wrote a separate blog post on this specific podcast, which you can read here.  

I have reframed and expanded on each of them below, relating them to struggles in children rather than adults.   

ADHD Results in a Deficit in Executive Functions:

1. Impulse Control.  The ability to STOP.  The ability to pause between the action and reaction.  The ability to pause before responding.
  "Response inhibition refers to the ability to withhold a cognitive or behavioural impulse that may be inaccurate or maladaptive." (Barkley, 2015).  
   
   Children are particularly vulnerable to this because their prefrontal cortex (important in decision making) is not yet fully developed, and even neurotypical children are impulsive.  Children with ADHD are thought to be approximately 30% behind their peers in PFC development, making the "stop and think" process even more difficult.  
   
   
2. Hindsight.  The ability to think about previous relevant information and use past experience to guide your current response. 
"Working memory deficits may adversely affect the social functioning of children with ADHD." (Kofler et al., 2011).  
   
   "Hmm, last time I did this... and this happened...  so maybe I should try...  this instead?"
   
   While most children with ADHD have average or above-average IQ (many are twice exceptional), learning from past experiences is more challenging when there are differences in the way they store and later access information as memories.  
   
   
3. Foresight.  Thinking ahead to longer-term consequences of your current behaviour before acting.  
   
   Children with ADHD have greater difficulty predicting possible outcomes of their choices and have greater difficulty connecting current behaviour with future consequences.  This means that delayed consequences such as detention, suspension, grounding, removal of future privileges, etc. are not likely to be effective in changing undesired behaviour.  Intervention, guidance, and support have to happen at the point of performance (meaning at the location and in the moment the behaviour is occurring). 
   
   Similarly, reinforcing positive behaviours must also occur at the point of performance, so we must make efforts to "catch" the child being good and not only be on the look out for negative behaviours.  
   
   
   
   
   
   Children with ADHD often struggle with low self-esteem and are often blamed for their disability.  Many children with ADHD internalize the constant negative messages from others, believing that it is their fault rather than being taught that their brains are wired differently.    
   
   So often I hear adults ask (and yes, I have heard myself say it!) "why isn't he learning from these consequences?"  That is why.  Impulsivity combined with a deficit in both hindsight and foresight (also referred to as working memory) make it very difficult for children with ADHD to learn from past mistakes without compassionate, non-judgemental support and guidance.  
   
   
   This means that a neurological difference is responsible for difficulty learning from consequences, not a desire to be "bad", and not from a lack of a desire to be "good".  
   
   
4. Self-talk.  Self-directed language to facilitate self-control.  
(Also referred to as verbal working memory or inner speech). 
   
   This is our inner monologue and refers to how we talk to ourselves inside our head to guide our decisions and remind ourselves of things we need to do.  Children start out having these conversations out loud when they are very young and as they mature these conversations gradually become internalized.  
   
   Each person's experience with ADHD is different, however ADHD experts such as Dr. Russell Barkley explain that the capacity for self-talk is less-developed and also develops later in life in people with ADHD.  The ability to talk to oneself in a positive and helpful way impacts one's self-esteem, memory, motivation, and decision-making.  Challenges with this executive function can have a significant impact on daily functioning.  
   
   
5. Emotional regulation.  The ability to manage one’s emotions to make them more socially acceptable.  

Our emotions are our motivation.  
   
   So, if a child with ADHD has "big feelings" (or emotional dysregulation), then they cannot entirely control the resulting behaviour.  They first need help with managing the feelings and developing self-regulation skills, only then can the behaviour change follow.  
   
   
   We don't hand a kid a basketball and expect them to sink a basket their first try, we teach them skills first.  Why, then, do we expect children to have the skills to manage their emotions if they haven't been taught?  
   

6. Self-Motivation.  Children with ADHD are dependant on the environment and its immediate consequences.
   
   
   This means that we, the adults, have to help them develop tools for self-reinforcing, especially (hopefully only - more on why below) for tasks they find less desirable.
   
   

   Addressing the presenting behaviour only "trains" a person to comply and do what is being asked of them, completely ignoring the underlying struggle that really needs to be addressed.

   
   

   For example, if we start a token economy system in the classroom or at home, it's highly important to involve the child(ren) as much as possible and give them as much ownership and control over the program as possible.  It is even more important that we gradually transition complete ownership and control of the program over to the child(ren) or students, once they are ready for this step.  
   
   Children and students need to find what is reinforcing for them, not have the adults decide what their rewards are, and they eventually need to be able to run this program for themselves so that they can do it on their own when they no longer have a teacher or parent's support.  
   
   Sound a little strange?  Think about the ways you do this for yourself in your own life.  
   
   "I had a good workout today, I'll reward myself with a beer"
   
   "I got in all my steps today, I think I've earned a little dessert"
   
   "After I finish this chore, I'll put my feet up and read a book" 
   
   

   Author's Note:  In my opinion, token economies should be used sparingly, and should only be used for undesirable tasks such as chores or homework, and should never be used to address behaviour challenges.  

   
   

   The reason for this is because behavioural problems come from a lack of skill, a lack of coping strategies, and/or underlying issues or concerns.  Addressing the presenting behaviour only "trains" a person to comply and do what is being asked of them, completely ignoring the underlying struggle that really needs to be addressed.  It's a bandaid solution because it does not teach skills or provide emotional support, and it puts the onus on the child, rather than on the competent adult with a fully developed prefrontal cortex.  

   
   

   

   
   

   For more on the problems with behaviourism and behaviour modification, Alfie Kohn wrote a blog post on the topic, as well as books on the subject called "Punished by Rewards" and "Unconditional Parenting".  

   
   

   But I digress....  Back to the List...  Now, where was I?  Oh yes!

7. The ability to plan and problem solve.  The ability to simulate multiple possible future options is the highest executive function in humans.  
   
   The ability to quickly run through multiple "hypothetical situations" in our mind, and then the ability to quickly change course when we run into a problem or when one of our options fails.  
   
   A lot of children (and adults) with ADHD struggle with cognitive flexibility (or flexible thinking).  When we have our mind set on something happening a certain way and that changes, it can be very difficult for us to adapt.  This is also a common struggle for people with anxiety, a comorbid condition with ADHD (meaning they commonly occur together).  Sometimes people with anxiety need to mentally prepare themselves for a situation, then if circumstances change this can greatly increase their anxiety because they haven't had an opportunity to mentally prepare.  

Important to note:

• Children with undiagnosed, untreated, or inadequately treated ADHD are 30% behind their peers when it comes to executive functioning.

2021 Note:  This was our most popular blog post in 2020, so we decided to expand upon this concept and have added a new blog about Common ADHD Myths.  

References 

Barkley, Russell A. (2015). Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: A Handbook for Diagnosis & Treatment. The Guilford Press.  

Kofler, M. J., Rapport, M.D., Bolden, J., Server, D.E., Raiker, J.S., & Alderson, R.M. (2011). Working memory deficits and social problems in children with ADHD. Journal of Abnormal Child Psychology, 39, 805-817. 

About the Author

Jillian is an ADHD 2e Coach and Child Advocate in Manitoba, Canada.

Jillian has a diploma in Child & Youth Work and a Degree in Psychology, as well as being the parent of an amazing 2e/ADHD child.

Visit ADHDPro.ca and Facebook.com/ADHD2ePro to learn more.